three four

spring snow

2007-03-01T14:15:00.000-08:00

a snow day!
the day before spring break? ...there's something really wrong with that.

oh well!

spring break to do list:

sleep
eat
play trumpet
write music
play music
turner classic film young composers contest
play with logic pro
clean my apartment
help josh build instruments
see doc severinsen
sleep
play trumpet
stay warm
be happy

better luck next time.

2007-02-26T15:35:00.000-08:00

today i did a couple really stupid/embarrasing and possibly quite nasty things. Someone might appreciate reading them. might make you feel a little more smart/considerate or sweet.

first:

someone returned an interlibrary loan today and looking at it more closely i realized i spelt their name "dummer" instead of "dumann". it would have been nice to catch that before giving it to them, instead of after they gave it back.

well played, julia. well played.
i'm a sad excuse for a librarian.

second:

i was changing for wellness and started chatting with this little blind girl who was arriving for her swimming lesson. she was very sweet and boldly asked me who i was when she heard me shuffling around. then, as i headed out of the change rooms i said, quite ignorantly, "see you later!"

she said it right back to me, but it sounded more like "yeah, seeeeeee you later!" she didn't see me blush.

happy monday!

when in december.

2006-12-28T23:51:00.000-08:00

movie of the night: scoop.
a much delayed viewing on my part. i've been meaning to see it for ages.
absolutely adorable! i love scarlette just as much as the last person, but woody really stole my heart this time. i love him really, with all due respect, he's a really beautiful person. he's a credit to his race. clever murder mystery plot and an endearing story of friendship. but really, who wouldn't want to befriend woody allen! "are you crazy?"

music of the night: tin hat trio. the book of silk.
a fantastic album! a mix of most of my favourite instruments; banjo, accordion, tuba, violin, guitar, whistling, etc. if i ever move to minneapolis i'll work on convincing them they need a trumpet player! bwahaha. the album is full of beautiful and eerie melodies, and just when you feel quite chilled and apprehensive the warm guitar arrives in track 14 and the tender lullaby of 15 as if to reassure you that its not all cold out there. thanks to the multiple friends who dropped the name of this group and planted the seed and to josh who finally put it in my hands. i love it.

the time of night: half past midnight.
i'm writing to pass the time in a desperate attempt to stay awake late enough to hang out with friends of the night crawling variety.

advice of the night: avoid airplanes at all costs.
and if you can't avoid planes, avoid airports in the middle of the night, and trying to sleep in them through the night for the sole purpose of waiting for a cancelled flight first thing in the morning. an easier way of avoiding planes is avoiding plains that you need to catch planes to go to and from. you should learn from my mistakes, for i do not take my own advice; but really, boats are better.

slice of the night: pumpkin pie.
'nuff said.

g'night,
sleep tight.

no rest for the weary.

2006-09-19T17:33:00.000-07:00

this week in pummeling me with things to do. so much work! so little time!
but for once, half of it is stuff that i love!

georgette (aka tara martin and i) is back at it again! making music with 10 times more enthusiasm then before and 20 times the productivity.

i am proud to announce our first show will be on october 11th at the red rooster. if you live near by, i suggest you show up and have a good time. what else would you do on a wednesday night?

chillingly splendid.

2006-09-17T21:22:00.000-07:00

there is something so wonderful about the cold.

i took off this evening on my bike and the crisp air filling my lungs was so refreshing. my body fought off the night's chill to keep itself warm, a battle so rewarding to win. now i can cuddle into my cozy little hobbit hole, content knowing that i have accomplished something.

for tonight, i have battled the elements and come out victorious.

i fear not the bitter cold of winter to come!

it is easy to stay warm without warm things around you.
even if they are miles away.

another splendidly chilling thing is "black dahlia." despite the complaints by fellow onlookers that it spread to far from the actual events, i think it was an extremely well done film. it was not quite as scary as i expected, though parts made my skin crawl, and i was also pleasantly surprised by mr. hartnett's performance. i've never been a huge fan. the beautiful soundrack can also not go unmentioned. i highly recommend this film.

i also recommend you start a new pandora radio station today. i can tell their collection is growing. i found a number of magical gems on my final fantasy station today.

stay warm,
julia.

north of the boarder.

2006-08-08T12:17:00.000-07:00

rumor has it bluetooth is coming out with a new wireless kite.
i can dig it.

in other news:
let's fill in the gaps of my hole-some blogging. i'd better jump back on the wagon before i fall too far behind and give up altogether.

.˙ two words: madison wisconsin.
the pictures are still trapped on my computer at the repair shop but envision this, 30 000 people in red and white, cheering at the tops of their lungs, and me, little julia, clinging to her trumpet for fear of dropping it due to extreme shaking knee syndrome. intense.

.˙ international trumpet guild convention.
again, a little nervous playing in front the pickiest trumpet crowd you could find. but the result? everyone loved it! it was wild!
"NSU, is that in New York?" "No, South Dakota, actually." [cue jaw hitting floor.] "Oh wow, you're all masters students there?" "No, we're actually all undergrads." [clunk] "Is there a doctor in the house?"

ok, so that is enough over-the-top bragging. i'm sorry. it's just been an exciting semester.

.˙ i've been inspired to write some music. ever read the mysteries of harris burdick? its a kids book by chris van allsberg and its reeeaaally wonderful. so head to your local library and track it down. anyways, i have a long term goal of writing a series, perhaps album, inspired by the book. two songs are started and i've got a bunch of ideas on the burner. its been awhile since i've been writing.

.˙ i also work at the local library now.

.˙ i've got my own apartment now in aberdeen. murder mystery house warming party coming soon!

.˙ more currently however, i am at home, and it is a beautiful life i am living here, however temporary it may be.

.˙ most importantly, next week i will become... A WARRIOR! i'm picturing myself as like, the girl version of john lock... meets xena, warrior princess... meets transformers... yeah. i'll be a changed girl when you see me next.

the bottom line is there is a lot going on in my life, some of it so exciting and tender my rambling blog isn't worthy. i hate these "ketchup" blogs. rambling, uninteresting, cruelly in-cohesive, and dull. its a good thing no one reads them.

es ist liebe,
julia.

kneeling days.

2006-04-09T22:33:00.000-07:00

one might think that i have been in germany all this time,
but i have not.

the trip was a burst of freedom from routine and resposibility, nonchalant galavanting and aimless wandering through the streets of a fascinating city. there was miscommunication in excess and not nearly enough of my brother because of his long work days. just to spend a bit of time with him was a blessing still. it's a wonder how i ever thought i hated my brother way back in the day.

here is a peak into my excursion through photos and excerpts from my travel log.

03/05/06 19.06h
"when fliying i never feel quite real. the houses become far too small, the street lamps become stars, and one can see the sun set that has already set. pg 6 of high fidelity and double mint gum."

03/06/06 14.40h
"realism has continued to fade as the illusion of time dissipates. i caught up to the sunrise much quicker then expected and lost my chance to sleep at night. my nose ran all over the plane on the 8 hour flight to amsterdam..."

03/06/06 16.30h
"arrive berlin. the first to welcome me was a little red fox when the plane landed. window seat, yeah. the second was the un-arrival of my suitcase. it is still in minneapolis. i told you so, mom!"

03/07/06 13.51h
"...turkish market on maybauch strauss. fresh produce, lots of fabric, dried fruit + nuts, and random mass produced clothing products. odd.
"...i did however find what cam refers to as 'crack chicken.' not quite as good as he made it out, but a decent lunch none the less."

03/09/06 15.52 h.
"today it is snowing in berlin. although the snow is simply beautiful, my morale has taken a tumble for other reasons. to satisfy a growling belly i tucked into a cute crepe shop. after a delicious cherry crepe, darjeeling tea, and german tin tin comic, i stupidly trundled off without paying. i was chased out to my own embarrassment, by a girl making obnoxious hand motions and yelling in broken english. it should have been easy to brush off and chuckle about, but the glaring eyes have made my mood plummet and the grey clouds look a bit more sinister.
"...the berlin dome was spectacular, although part of me wishes i had some religion to make the visit a bit deeper. the other part can't help but think religion is so gaudy, excuse the pun."

03/11/06 1.17 h.
"early morning berlin. sleep calls but i met gin and tonic tonight. they both wound me up and i won't sleep for hours. the liars were wild and an incredibly tight show, despite our late arrival and being buried at the back of 'white trash fast food. these guys were a raucous noise rock trio with an amazing wet suit clad drummer. i loved it. white trash was crazy; upstairs a maze of stairs and levels, and downstairs a sinister cave, complete with artificial rock walls and ceilings and a dramatic red velvet drape to envelope the band.
"... i lost my coat check ticket in typical julia style, so i'll go back tomorrow and pick it up when there isn't such a huge crowd...
"... cameron's drink of choice (g+t) and cigarettes (french style) over fajitas (the best i've ever had) warmed my coatless shoulders."

03/11/06 19.30 h.
"fuck. my coat isn't there. how freaking typical! the last trip it was my holga! i'm such a flake."

03/14/06 12.00 h.
"there has been coat shopping and exploring galore. i found a neighborhood with the most incredible graffiti. i've seen the golden penis horse twice now. i can't believe i'm leaving so soon.
"... man. i loved that coat."

much has been going on since berlin, as well. i will fill you in soon!
j.

germany.

2006-03-05T14:22:00.000-08:00

i am going.

did you know?

i get to see my brother!

i'll tell you all about it someday.

take off in 2 hours,

julia.

i saved latin.

2006-02-20T20:18:00.000-08:00

god bless long weekends.
•i slept in 3 days in a row. **angelic voices**
•watched one of my favourite movies.
•i wrote a hip play.
•made sushi.
•i caught them in the crosshairs and took them down.
•i also watched "hotel rwanda" which made me cry and helped with (said issue in previous blog) the bigger picture.
•got a really neat idea for practicing improve from the doc... listen...

read while you play. play the sentences. it forces you to make statements and sentences instead of droning blah blah blah on and on with out saying anything at all forever and ever etc., etc., etc.

clever. catch up on reading while you practice.

exciting note:
my playing is getting more consistent up there^. up high. yeah. woot.

maybe we'll meet again someday.
when the fighting stops,
julia.

ps. it's uhh... a jellyfish.

mixed tape.

2006-02-18T16:17:00.000-08:00

i love monterey pepper jack.

i hate stubbed toes.

these are the insignificant things that often fill my days. i need to get a life and more importantly, get a glimps of the bigger picture.

since this weekend is long, i don't feel so guilty about letting the day slip away. but i have... and i feel guilty.
i slept in late.
i was an extra in the funeral scene of a movie about which i know nothing.
i watched wedding crashers... baba ganoush!
i started a mixed tape.

perhaps a game of bowling will revive this collapsed day.

i am getting quite concerned about this summer. whatever i do i'll miss something because running to and from aberdeen and victoria gets expensive quick... ridiculously so. the gigs in aberdeen are getting more and more spread out. the easiest thing would be to stay put in one place, but that would be a little painful, all things considered.

spring break is only a couple weeks away. that deserves a big... eeeeeeeek!
germany is waiting!

~pointless ramblings of the sore toed~

the fourteenth.

2006-02-14T17:55:00.000-08:00

aidan knight, will you be my valentine?

hang tight, moon.

2006-02-12T00:14:00.000-08:00

earlier today the moon was low.
it looked twice the size it usually does
and incredibly out of place against the still blue/grey sky.
i've never seen it hang quite like that before.

can you see it now, from where you are? where else is the bright bulb shedding light?

some highlights from this weekend:
•a waterbed
•pick-up sticks
•a four-rowed rubix cube (proving my halloween costume quite accurate)
•audjudicating/incouraging/wanting-to-be little 5th to 8th grade musicians
•enjoying the better things in life, disk 2
•cereal for supper
•de-stressifying brianne
•photo's at the coffee smith and a street corner in germany
•"forty" "two" "forty" "two" "forty" "two" "alright!"

i'm not ready for tomorrow yet.
it is lost's fault.

hang in there moon, dearest.

love,
sleep walker.

clean dishes.

2006-02-10T21:41:00.000-08:00

there are things on my plate right now.
things i'm taking care of,
with knives and forks and barbeque sauce.

a) trumpet: i am so intensly focused on beating these little devils of bad habits that are haunting my playing. soon i will be a completely different player. i think i finally have a real understanding of the adam's method and what i should be aiming for and working at. so far it's a slow and painstaking process, but let's see where it gets me. i also have an incurable itch to wail. i want scales under my fingers and solos that rip. here i go. watch me go, go, go.

jazz band has been giving me that incredible feeling that music does sometimes. the shivers that lift you up and take you away. the sensation that obsesses every inch of my being and makes me never want to stop playing. playing "first circle" is almost orgasmic, if i can be so forward.

b) the first season of "lost": i am on the 3rd disk and it is absorbing my life... must finish it before i starve.

c) the 9km+ mark: this issue has no resolution but time. it is absorbing me just as tv on dvd can do, but i shall try to keep my cool by burying myself in books, scores, and sounds.

eat your beans,
julie (since numerous people have been calling me that as of late.)

set me straight.

2006-01-29T21:33:00.000-08:00

oatmeal & raisin cookies are the most delicious cookies ever,
vrai ou faux?

if a wallflower blossoms it is still on the wall,
vrai ou faux?

ice is nice. its fun to skate to class,
vrai ou faux?

telephones and speaking on telephones are both things to be nervous about,
vrai ou faux?

it is better to dream then doubt,
vrai ou faux?

psyching one's self out is a natural tendency,
vrai ou faux?

the above are all matters of opinion, yet on monday, the most passive day of the week, i would much rather my opinion be based on a general consensus or majority.

happy birthday mozart!

2006-01-27T17:11:00.000-08:00

you look good for 250 years!
but you sound better, my dear.

you sound damn fine.

the roar, the year, the rise.

2006-01-14T00:18:00.000-08:00

I'm back to one of my many "homes." Not that I gave any hints that I had left at all, in my blogging hiatus.

Going home to the holidays was incredible, though at times it didn't feel like there was much holiday left after all the working I did. The season has left me feeling alive out of excitement, human out of vulnerabiltiy, and in complete awe of how everyonce in awhile, something can happen exactly how you dreamt it.

The new year calls for some kind of list. Best of 2005 or some-such thing. How about categories?

Best Shows I saw in 2005
4. Decemberists in Fargo, North Dakota
3. Shapes and Sizes in Victoria, BC
2. Lila Downs at Folk Fest in Edmonton, AB
1. Sufjan Stevens in Omaha, Nebraska

Most Moving Musical Moments
4.Tegan and Sarah sing-along in a mom van to Minneapolis.
3. Jamming with Guy Davis
2. Filling the summer streets of downtown Victoria/Hey Jude Trumpet riff with Black Tie Social.
1. Samuel Barber's Adagio for Strings in brass quintet.

Most Endearing Moments with Food of 2005
4. Soggy Waffles in the blizzard.
3. Dad cutting the watermelon.
2. Cinnamon toast crunch at the fifty-fifty.
1. Mashed Potatoes with Chopsticks for Canadian Thanksgiving.

Greatest Tragedies of 2005
4. I burnt the cutting board. That is not the tragedy. It was art and shouldn't have been thrown out.
3. iPod shuffle, rest in peace.
2. Falling asleep during sin city, for more then one reason.
1. A broken heart and a friendship flailing helplessly for survival.

Greatest Kodak Moments
3. That little tiny girl that danced to Jason Cook, Aidan Knight, and I busking.
2. Grad crashing with Gerald-Gregory and Veronica Charles (right through the kitchen was a definite photo-op).
1. A burning tree down the Saskatchewan River, the greatest of all stealth missions.

Best Games of 2005
3. Connect Four
2. Making lists with Devlan at Murchies.
1. Cano-ball

Best Fortune Cookies of 2005
3. A truly creative person rids him or herself of all self-imposed limitations. Lucky Numbers 37, 15, 5, 42, 11, 7
2. Good books are friends who are always ready to talk to us. Lucky Numbers 4, 18, 50, 33, 21, 42
1. Love is in the air. Lucky Numbers 7, 22, 38, 11, 40, 5

Greatest Successes of 2005
3. Kept up a 4.0 and still going (nerds unite)!
2. Made Jazz Band and being invited to join a lucrative brass quintet (small feats at a time)!
1. I moved to a city where I didn't know a soul, met people, made friends, and felt at home, all in one summer!

Top 10 things that prove 2006 will be an incredible year
10. Slightly fewer credits this semester, meaning more time for things I want to do.
9. An inspiring conversation with a cocky man who is out there living it (I shall continue to pick his brain in the next few days).
8. The colour green and a street called The Rise.
7. Live Wilco listening party/Wilco concert (fingers crossed).
6. More music history classes.
5. Peers around me are fueled and ready to drive. I'm riding the wave. (Possibly starting a folk band among other things!!)
4. The prospect of packages in the mail/sending mail!
3. Wide open spring break just waiting for an exciting trip.
2. A night in a fort, a flashlight to stare at, a pillow to hide in, and many confessions.
1. A pact.

Thank you so much for the visits in '05 from Brianne (BFF 4EVA!), and Tara (Momma Turkey) this year at home. Love the girls. Many thanks to everyone in Victoria for welcoming me into your lives with such open arms and warm embraces. It really feels like home. '05 will be hard to beat.

Happy New Year to every love in my life.
Je t'aime,
Julia.

Julia Wakal Gallery - Grand Opening

2005-12-14T14:29:00.000-08:00

A collection of drawings.

BOOM!

2005-12-14T09:33:00.000-08:00

whoa... what was that?

it's coming soon to a blog near you!

>>>>>>julia lorraine wakal's online gallery opening!<<<<<<

the semester is done and i can't help but feel a little proud of the work i did in my first art class ever. so once the battery in my camera is charged i shall share all my charcoal and ink with you here in this very blog. so WATCH OUT! CAPITALIZED!

i have three days left in aberdeen; one paper and one jazz band rehearsal away from complete freedom. POW! take that! 3 semesters of 8 over and done!

i'm coming home!
accordula

the shift to the next

2005-12-09T07:32:00.000-08:00

Today is my last day of class.
I have far to much to do in this next week, but tonight I'm taking a break and going to see Narnia!
I am exploding with excitement.
I think the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe was the first book me and my dad read together, or perhaps it was second after The Secret Garden.

I am also going carolling tonight!

Yesterday I lay under the grand piano in the recital hall while Darcy Brandenburg, that wonderful friend of mine, played incredibly beautiful music that shook my bones and rattled my soul. I want to be able to play piano like that.

Other things of not-such-interest; I am working on a self portrait (the eyes are too big and the face is too wide, both of which I shall try to fix today), I got an email from an old band director that just made my day, and I shall eat some free pizza later today.

Almost time to say goodbyes and slip away for a month, a month of hellos and good fun, and lots of practice for some auditions next semester.

Blink,
Jules

another's words/absorbed in thought

2005-12-05T21:07:00.000-08:00

When I am at a loss for words myself there are words of others that speak to me. not voices in my head, but the song on the stereo.

"fill up your mind with all it can know
don't forget that your body will let it all go
fill up your mind with all it can know
what would we be without wishful thinking?

"chambers of chains
with red plastic mouths
the inside of outside
no one has found
how to unring the bell
it's just as well
the turntable sizzles
the casting of spells
the pressure devices
hell in a nutshell
is any song worth singing if it doesn't help?

"fill up your mind with all it can know
don't forget that your body can let it all go
fill up your mind with all it can know
'cause what would love be without wishful thinking?

"open your arms
as far as they will go
take off your dress
and embarrassing poem was written when I was alone
in love with you
I shook down these lines
to shine up the streets
I got up off my hands and knees
to thank my lucky stars that you're not me

"what would we be without wishful thinking?"

I am sorry for being repetitive and predictable. I swear Wilco isn't all I listen to every minute of the day. I've been listening to that Charlie Brown Christmas album... oh is it ever good, and another incredible mixed Christmas CD from a dear friend. That same dear friend recommended this web site and now I recommend it to you because its worth every hour of my life it will waste in the near future.

http://pandora.com/

If you haven't been there already, you won't regret it.

le nombril et les coudes,
jules

An album to die to.

2005-11-30T17:28:00.000-08:00

American thanksgiving...

Who'd have known it was such a life threatening holiday, and that one may have more to be thankful for by its end? It started out purely innocent; gorging ourselves with delicious food, shopping, singing, dancing, checkers, and 21 for a night at Hooky Jacks. Then at the joyful weekends close we had mocked Tara's grandparents for driving home a day early for fear of a blizzard. Blizzard? Ha! The sun is shining! Its georgeous out! Then the snow hit, then the slush hit, then it all froze, and then we were far too scared to brave the road ahead.

We stopped in Miller at the tiniest Super 8 I've seen in my life, 20 rooms maybe? Not even a vending machine. We enjoyed a few hours of frivilous bed jumping, TV watching, and nibbling on leftover Qudoba, even discussing braving the sleet and ice to fetch Dairy Queen from across the highway. If only we had because shortly after the power went out. We were thrust into darkness, the wind pounding against paper thin windows and walls.

We huddled up in bed, falling into a worried sleep but soon, to our enthusiasm, we were woken up in the middle of the night by our lights turning on! Oh glorious electricity! I will never take you for granted again! A shame we didn't rush to turn the heater on and plug in Tara's cell phone as quickly as we rushed to turn off all the lights. When we woke early the next morning in hopes of getting an early start home, the bathroom light was no longer on how we left it. What was worse was the deafening howl of the wind and the blinding, never ending, white out the window. There was no going anywhere and the room, by 7am was already getting cold.

Heading down to the complimentary continental breakfast in hopes of nourishment, we were greeted by a room of hunters, stale english muffins, soggy ego waffles, and the lack of a working toaster or hot coffee. The orange juice was refreshing but all i really wanted was a banana. We carefully rationed my bag of salt water taffy and stomached cold soggy egos and jam for lunch. I sat by the window for awhile trying to read Douglas Coupland's, "Life After God" without opening the curtain all the way, and destroy what was left of our precious warmth. The cold didn't take long to take hold, though, and I was forced to curl up in bed, coat and all, and play 21 questions and I Spy. What a waste of a snow day!

The wind didn't pause for even a second all day. I'm ever so thankful that the power came through around 4 or 5. If it hadn't I might have been an icecube by the time we made it out of Miller. When the power came on, the kind hearted hotel owners offered to cook macaroni and cheese for us. The goodness of human kind has been proven once again. If you ever stumble upon Miller, South Dakota, stop at the Super 8 and meet the owners, each with a heart of gold. If it weren't for them me and Tara may have eaten the little baby down the hall, or one of the hunters dogs... or each other.

The next morning after struggling to scrape the thick layer of ice of the windshield, we made a safe ride home in only about double the time it should have taken. Tara is the most excellent driver I have ever had the pleasure of riding with. What's more then that, if I had been stuck in that tiny, cold room with anyone else, I would have been at my wits end before I had even fallen asleep. Tara's company was what kept me sane. She made me laugh even when I wanted to cry of boredom, and distracted my hunger by calling me homeless. There is nobody I would rather have been stuck in the middle of nowhere with.

A toast to the joy of friendship, being back in Aberdeen, and being alive!

In the sleet and ice before reaching Miller an album was playing on our CD player that I decided I would gladly have playing as we rolled into the ditch and were burried in snow forever. I'm sure you can guess it. Everyone loves it and if you don't then pull it out and take another listen. Wilco's "A Ghost is Born." Its tragic, empowering, and full of revelations, all in one. An album I would like to die to. Is that morbid?

Its snowing and now that I don't have to drive anymore, I am hoplessly glad. Tender snowflakes have been falling all day and left me smiling. Just 7 more days of class, then exam week, then HOME!

Push to the end,
Julha

the warm embrace of winter.

2005-11-15T00:01:00.000-08:00

I can feel it in the wind. The snow is just around the corner and Christmas is coming in such a rush that I can almost hear the caroling already. Here I am caught between seasons, no more leaves to float from the trees, and only a brief disappearing snowfall to tide me over till it really comes down. The seasons are not all I am caught between now. In my blogging hiatus I have been absorbed by something new, warm, and exciting... and scary... and risky... and messy. I'm pressed between getting involved in something that doesn't involve me and avoiding getting myself into something that I want terribly to be a part of, to explore, and to enjoy. Confusing? I know! If it makes no sense its because it makes no sense.

For the first time I am experiencing the part of small town life that I never noticed before. Its that stereotypical, everyone knows everyone elses business. If there are no secrets in Aberdeen, then perhaps I shouldn't try to keep them, or rather avoid situations that require secrecy? Perhaps I am blowing everything into outrageous dramatics, completely out of proportion. My mind says wait on it. For SO many reasons!

stepping on toes
making people angry, people I will spend a couple more years or so with
getting caught up, off guard
not the right time (at all)
not the right age
one degree short
... someone else, in another city far away, who I miss, but I don't know why...

Yet I am here and the season begs for hot chocolate and tender words. If Christmas came now and swept me away, I might be all the happier. A fort, bathtub, and a ukelele might answer all my confusions, or perhaps double them in strength.

All I know is that I am relieved that the week ahead of me is far to busy to even think, let alone be concerned, draw conclusions, or make decisions. There are basketball games to play peppy music at, band clinics to be symphonic at, and best of all, a jazz band gig at the end of the week to learn to ballroom dance at. I can't wait to jitterbug, foxtrot, jive, or swing, whatever they decide to teach me. Then on monday... a big paying gig? I heard a rumour about 100 clams! I hope that comes through. I could buy christmas gifts!

I should also mention that this weekend I hid under a piano and spent a night with a gaggle of cool kids in a locked building climbing catwalks, exploring costume rooms, wearing sombreros, dancing (the break variety), and beatboxing. That possibly the kind of illegal activity that shouldn't be advertised on the internet, but it was innocent, and way to fucking cool to keep to myself.

"leave me to my dumb antics"
yours,
lame face

well, if the cookie said so...

2005-11-02T16:04:00.000-08:00

one should not be so lonely with a fortune such as this. lovers please apply within.

Swing from the tree, lonely.

2005-10-30T22:42:00.000-08:00

Its a strange strange life, this swinging pendulum I lead. In one day I go from utter dispair to inexplicable exuberance. Today I am so glad that joy showered from the bell of my horn, something I haven't felt for awhile. I used to constantly be put in the highest of spirits when I put the trumpet to my face but I've found frustration lately. Today it felt damn good... thank goodness!

Swish...
The funk I started my day in is probably better kept deep in my secret heart. It was lonely. I don't want to be lead on. I adored the meandering astro-night. Physics of finger to nose and feet to the sky. Behind it all I knew there was another gal but I was there and it felt nice to talk and feel not quite so alone. We both came to that realization with parting I'm sure, but I was less ready to admit it. The cool shoulder, not cold, but luke warm hurt me, just a little, because I was back to being alone again. I was the only one alone, though. I don't want to be silly anymore. I don't want to get wrapped up in such goofy emotions that I materialize out of imaginary moments, mistaken glances, and meaningless embraces. My halloween costume would have been silly enough on it's own.

As the pendulum swings back...
I know halloween isn't until tomorrow but I couldn't help but celebrate early with it being on a monday and all. I have outdone myself this year. I don't want to sound cocky but I take great pride in my costume history. This year, however, tops all previous masterpieces. Ladies and gentlemen I have two words.

Rubix Cube!

I am proud to be a nerd. So much that I will tell you that it is hand painted rubix cube with one rotating side. Dammmnn.

Tick...
Goodbye Cameron! Goodluck dear brother! Have a safe flight and an outrageous adventure! I forgot to say on the phone how much I will miss you at Christmas! I said goodbye but then shouted "Hold on!" Its too bad that you were so concerned with your cell phone bill because it made you quick to click. I know I don't see you or hear from you much as it is but I confess I got teary eyed at the thought of our meager christmas gathering, like a three legged dog. It won't be the same without a brother around. Love you, so.

Squeak...
Now, dig this sweet look. My dear friend Aidan Knight, that clever boy, designed me this hep new swag. Thank you. I feel cool now. Don't forget that BOREDOM BREEDS GLORY!
Thank you Aidan.

mad bi-polar,
julia lonelyinacrowdedroom
julia smilesanyways

90% chance of awesome.

2005-10-17T23:34:00.000-07:00

This week will be better. What a fine Monday indeed. I thought today was the 20th but it is the 17th.
That means that a proclaimed "belated" package in the mail may end up right on time.
That means that October will last 3 days longer.
That means maybe I can go see The Decemberists in Omaha because the 22nd isn't in the middle of the week.
That means that the 20th is a Thursday and I adore Thursdays.
Today is also exactly two months until I am in Edmonton visiting with old friends.
Today I played knees.
Today I watched "The Dinner Game," a hilarious french film that made me chuckle.

"When tears are pretzels pouring down each time the
sweetness is returning
at times when you appreciate that you survived"
(S. Lerche)

Chance of Showers

2005-10-11T21:28:00.000-07:00

Yes, I agree. I do love to read it in the forcast. It rained today, just when I came out the building after practicing late. I decided to walk, and every block I told myself I would turn at the next corner, but I continued past every corner. I listened to Lauren's Damien Rice CD twice over before the sprinkling rain stopped and I headed for home.

I am thankful for my beautiful thanksgiving Monday.
+ Pumpkin pie and chopsticks, an unusual combination, yet fitting for the occasion.
+ Laughs, laundry, and Larry my Jack-o-lantern.
+ Funny poses with Korean friends, Sunny and Jin.
+ A stealthy mission into the haunted attic of a hall on campus to end the night... freaking creepy.

What a wonderful day.

I thought about you, pumpkin boy. I would mail you some pie if I thought it would make it. I've never made a more delicious pie.

Sweet dreams,
Julia

Up Northern Wolves!

2005-09-30T21:27:00.000-07:00

Happy Gypsy Days one and all! Its Homecoming week (nearing the end, I suppose) and the man who helped me move my fridge is our Homecoming Gypsy Marshall! How splendid. The Homecoming Queen, on the other hand, I have never seen in my life. I guess when you are in the marching band you're really not expected to know people. Tomorrow will be a crazy day of marching in the Gypsy Days parade and at the big football game. This is such a stereotypical american college. It makes me laugh.

Sufjan Stevens was phenomenal.
They shook me up inside and got me excited about music and touring and life and future. They were absolutely electric and ecstatic and blew me away. There were at least 9 of them crammed onto the stage in the Sokol basement, all dressed in coordinated orange and purple Illinois cheer outfits.
I love love loved it.
Omaha was wonderful. I can't wait to go back to the city. The Decemberists play at the end of October. Maybe I will actually SEE them this time around if I run away to Omaha again.

We went to the zoo in the morning and saw gorillas. I stood and stared at his hands for what felt like forever. They looked like "strength" if you could see the word materialized. The elephants were so beautiful. I am always amazed that an animal that is so massive, wrinkled, and grey can be so incredibly beautiful. There were also tons of monkeys just tossed in at the oddest places and more tigers and other felines than I have seen in one place. The Omaha zoo is definitely one to see!

Its an antisocial night for me. I am hiding out all by myself, trying to finish up my drawings, listening to radio feeds over the internet. I have been in high spirits lately, despite my horn and I having bitter disputes on and off. Maybe it is because I got my scarves and mittens out at last. Unfortunately there's a warm spell coming up so they will have to hang behind my door for a bit longer. It's supposed to be 90 on monday (Fahrenheit that is). Yeesh! Doesn't sound like October to me! EEEK! I can't wait till October. What a beautiful month.

I really miss Edmonton in the Autumn. There is this place in the river valley that I loved to sit when the leaves were yellow, on those two or three days before they fall to the ground. There was a perfect little crevice to lay back into and look up at the bright yellow against the bright blue sky. I will never forget that spot.

I haven't been writing to people nearly as much as I'd like. I suppose I should be doing that right now instead of typing this pointless blog. I've been busy as always, but now there is a new demon (or should I call it an old friend?) that is absorbing valuable sleeping hours. I'm getting sucked back into Garage Band. I have a few songs on the go, but knowing me they will never be fully finished. I will avoid it tonight until I finish all 18 drawings I have to do... better get on that.

We got fish! There are four of them! They are so precious! I get to name the one with the little black stripe on his head. It looks like a mohawk so I was thinking Judy or Ramona, but I also kind of want to name it Django. I suppose it depends if I decide if it is a boy or a girl. I will be sure to keep anyone interested updated on my dear fish's name.

Goodnight.

2005-09-19T22:32:00.000-07:00

I hate the trumpet. I want to smash it.

Shake it in the grave.

2005-09-18T18:13:00.000-07:00

Have you ever wanted to party with the dead? I just did last night. It was splendid. There was a Zombie Party at the home of dear friends Tara, Robin, and Emily. What rad, rad ladies and a rad, rad night. I went as the late Audrey Hepburn.

There was a dead scene kid,
dead batman,
a really intense burn victim,
and many other random dead people.

What a night.

The strap on my accordion broke this weekend. Its pretty much driving me mad because I just want to play it. My trumpet teacher asked me to come play accordion in his music appreciation class and I decided I would try to learn La Vie en Rose special to play for them. Now I probably won't because I will take too long deciding whether to make one, order one, or fix this one somehow. Go team indecisive!

I managed to forget my frustration briefly when I went walking in the rain today. It was wonderful. I got incredibly drenched and then went to the art studio to work on my perspective project. Drawing class continues to be incredibly exciting. I keep surprising my self and drawing things that I didn't think I could do very well. At my last class I got up to get some water, came back and said to myself "Who drew that? I couldn't have!" I had been so wrapped up in the details that I didn't realise what the entire picture looked like.

I'm going full out badass this week and skipping classes to see Sufgan Stevens in Omaha. Its a six hour drive and I am damn pumped. Word on the street is that Omaha is an awesome city so I can't wait to see it. It will be my first time in the state of Nebraska. I'm checking them all off, one at a time. Can't wait for Monday to be over and Tuesday morning to arrive with all its skipping town glory. I love long drives to lovely places.

I would like to thank my dear friend Mr. Knight for re-introducing Ron Sexsmith to me. He is utterly splendid. He's not the only thing I jacked from you that I adore though. Stars and Kings of Leon have pretty much been playing here in my little room non-stop. Thank you.

Can someone PLEASE tell me why I can't make titles for my posts? I want to make clever titles! Where is the title option? BAH!

My fortune forcast according to cookies reads.

"Genius is more work then genius."

&

"Good books are friends who are always ready to talk to us." (I love that one)

word.

2005-09-10T16:49:00.000-07:00

First thing's first.

I love Black Tie Social.

Have a fucking awesome show tonight. You have no idea how badly I wish I could be there to see it. You will kill. I know it. I miss you all.

Next...

My brother might be MOVING TO BERLIN! He might get a 6 month internship in GERMANY!! THAT'S IS SO FUCKING COOL! GO CAMERON!! I can't wait to go visit him. It isn't even for sure yet and I am already making plans. Anyone interested in going to Germany with me sometime this year, apply with in. I may have to sell all of my worldly possesions to make the money, but hell, that's how much I love my brother. I miss you, Cameron.

2005-09-06T20:05:00.000-07:00

I feel my chops slowly returning to me. I missed playing trumpet all day! I am starting to think again. God damn, I love music history. Woodsy spent an entire class talking about how hard and boring the material was but when he got down to it, I fell in love. I am such a nerd. I love school. I love books. I love learning about the Greeks, the quarter tones, Ethos, Musica mundana, humana, and instrumentalis, music's relationships with science, math, and astrology: music of the spheres. I am so glad to be back. I'm taking drawing! How cool is that! I'm gonna be a drawer mammy! And I am FINALLY back into french. FINALLY! Soon I will be able to turn the subtitles off and watch Amelie the way it should be watched, IN FRENCH! (Maybe that will take awhile, but STILL) My old habits are returning to me, good mostly. Practice, practice, study, study. I have, however, fallen into a familiar trap... the chalupa. DUH DUH DUH! I promised myself I would avoid American eating habits, the fried food, the pop, and yet, I cannot escape from my beloved chalupa. DAMN YOU CHALUPA! There are worst things aren't there?

Being single again... whoa...a bizarre feeling after what seems like a lifetime instead of 10 months. Lifetime in a good way though, that sounded all wrong. I don't know if I can handle being so distant from someone that has been so close. We talk, we're cool, but we are on edge or something, strangers almost. Give it time, right? Well, I'm impatient.

I want to go jam at the Rooster tonight. Tuesday nights is when all the ol' timers play bluegrass and country. Too bad I have no car and I'm already sick of bumming rides. BAH! I want my public transportation back! Thursday I'm gonna go play at Graham hall, maybe a little Yoshimi, a little Ain't No Aunshine, maybe wip out a new one now that I have all the keys back on my full 120 bass accordion.

I shall end with some word of advice, relayed by a dear, dear friend of mine.

"Always eat what the fat kid eats."

109 Days till Christmas

2005-09-04T11:37:00.000-07:00

I am a destroyer.

I am cruel and selfish.

I watched a heart break in front of me. I watched it crushed, tight in my own fist, unable to release clenched fingers, just so that I could chase away my own dark cloud. It might have been easier to lie, to pretend, but just as cruel. There is a weight lifted from my shoulders but with it comes guilt. What a long wait for a bitter end.

I am sorry. I hope you will forgive me.

2005-09-01T08:30:00.000-07:00

I just ate half an avacodo with my spoon that has a yellow handle, in my room that has an air conditioner, and on my chair that rocks a little. I'm back in Aberdeen, back in school. I pretty much didn't stop laughing the first two days I was here. I am working to get one dark cloud to clear from above me and then the year should be clear sailing.

It took only 2 days of class for me to get stressed out. I am turning to indifference to calm my mind. If these courses don't count towards my major in the end, who gives a fuck. Atleast I will be able to draw! Ha... ha... ha ha... heh...

I caught a cricket and put it in a fish bowl! I was hoping he would chirp a lot. Not so much.

I felt like I actually had something to say when I set out to write this. Not so much. Lot's on the mind that shouldn't be written down.

I lead a dull life...occasionally.
Julia

2005-08-26T18:13:00.000-07:00

This old hotel...

once thrived and pulsed, the heart of glitz and glamour in Billings, Montana, if not everywhere east of Denver and west of Minneapolis, hosting such highlifes as royalty, Prince Olaf and Princess Martha. That was until it burnt down in the 40s and it's attempted rehabilitation must have been slightly less then a success. My dear Grandpa pointed out a cracked mirror, a missing elevator button for the second floor, and styrofoam cups with a chuckle at the AAA discription of the "historic hotel". Road trips with Grandparents are wonderful.

So here I am a day away from Aberdeen South Dakota, and the return to student life, and two days behind me sits an island that has burrowed itself into my heart. Or perhaps it was my heart that was left burried in the sand. When I first arrived I was so amused by how few people were originally from the island. Everyone had some story about visiting a friend, or coming for vacation and never leaving. Now I understand why. I fell in love. However excited I am to be back at school,burried in music and books, I can't wait to come back to the ocean and the island and my dear summer friend.

2005-07-28T20:41:00.000-07:00

I have succumbed to temptation. I have joined the ranks of bloggers around the world. Do I know why? Not a clue. The sleek visual appeal, and clever anecdotes of other's blogs have compelled me to ramble pointlessly on about life and living. I am sorry Altman... ? Who knows how long it will last.

Today... well today I sent Wonderful Tara off on the Ferry, after a whirlwind tour of the Buchard Gardens. Oh tourists! You make me laugh, tourists! How many pictures of begonias does one person need?

Then after that, a sad sad attempt at working out at the gym. I should stick to music and reading and other un-athletic pursuits. Can you picture me? Perched amidst beefy men and built women, with the lightest dumbbells I can find, swaying back and forth with exhaustion, just after picking them up off the rack, that is. Go ahead and laugh. It also didn't help that I had no music to listen to. I caught myself humming random tunes under my breath. Don't think people didn't turn from their treadmills to see who's mumbled singing dare interrupt their methodic pace. Some may now be wondering, "Why Julia, what happened to your iShuffle that you got free from TD bank?" That is a story I haven't yet shared with anyone, and honestly wouldn't in person, for I am horribly, horribly embarrassed. So what I am saying, is never mention this again, to anyone, especially me.

I put it through the washing machine. It's dead. I killed it. I am so lame.

To end on a lighter note, my parents bought another massive box of blueberries. I love this island.